The Slow Wedding

At first I didn’t think our upcoming December 2011 wedding was suitable for my re-skilling blog. It’s not like I’ll be able to knit socks afterward.

But once we started brainstorming priorities and plans, I realized that weddings are just another example of how out of touch my generation has become with the essentials. Just as our food has become unnecessarily complicated, so too have weddings. Essentially, weddings are a celebration of love and union. They are a chance for family and friends to witness the exchange of vows/promises between two people in love. A wedding should be a celebration.

Instead (as I’ve learned after attending two bridal trade shows, perusing a few bridal magazines, and witnessing a number of friends plan their events), weddings have become elaborate, expensive, stressful affairs. If you let yourself get sucked into the wedding industry propaganda, you will easily find yourself spending hundreds or, more likely, thousands of dollars on a dress you’ll wear for one day. You will order a cake that costs more than any item of clothing I currently own. And you may even (like one friend-of-a-friend) find yourself wearing a tiny piece of jewellery that could easily put three people through university. Ludicrous. Clothes and jewellery aren’t priorities in my day-to-day life, so why would they be priorities for my wedding?

The expense is one thing. The stress is another. With all the elements of even a relatively simple wedding, a wedding can become an enormously complicated event. Building a house is nothing, compared to being the general contractor for an army of DJs, photographers, videographers, florists, hair stylists, make up artists, dress fitters and seamstresses, tailors, chefs and servers, a venue, the officiant … not to mention all the guest-politics that need to be considered.

Anyhoo, my point is that weddings have become ridiculous, and not at all like they could/should be. Just like our bread, our beverages, and many other aspects of our lives.

So Brock and I have invented a new movement: the slow wedding.

Our wedding priorities = good wine and no engagement ring.

Just like the slow food movement, our wedding will be as uncomplicated as possible. It will focus on what’s really important to us (family, friends and food) instead of all the elaborate baggage that we’re told to care about.

Instead of expensive clothes and an engagement ring (which aren’t important to us), we’ll put our money toward good food (ideally grown by ourselves and our fellow local, organic food producers) and good wine.

We will choose to support local, ethically-minded businesses in the spirit of slow money. (That means I get to go to the spa.)

Instead of stressing about guest lists, RSVPs and seating arrangements, we’re going to have a small ceremony followed by an open-house style reception, so we can celebrate and visit with our family and close friends.

A friend of ours is marrying us. We’ll pay another (photographer) friend to bring her camera along.

So there you are. We’ve begun a new movement and I can check off another basic skill learned this year: how to get married.

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